A Mother's Love

When my mother suffered a massive stroke in 2006, I quickly realized that my life was forever changed. The one person on whom I had always relied; the best friend who had always stood beside me; my biggest cheerleader and fan; and the one person who could come down on me the hardest--was slipping away. Although her body was quickly deteriorating, her mind was sharp. God gave me a wonderful gift of five weeks to sit together, talk, think back on old times, cry together, and to say goodbye. One day in the nursing facility, one of the workers commented that I looked like my mother. I had never seen that. My mother was a fair skin, auburn haired, petite framed China doll in my eyes. I had dark hair and dark skin with larger frame, and looked more the rag-doll type. The attendant went on to comment that a mother's love was the closest we can get to God's love in this life. Those words rang in my ears in the days to come, and I still feel they are some of the truest I've ever heard.

I was blessed to have a Godly mother that, I believe, instilled in me the basics of right and wrong. She taught me from a servant's heart, and she taught me how to love my husband, my children, my friends, and even those not so dear to my heart. Godly mothers are indeed a gift of God, and on this Mother's Day, I thank Him for mine. I pray that I can be half the mother to my children that my mother was to me. As I watched my mother transition from this life to the next, I realized what God had really done for me when chose Mary Carvell Coleman to be MY mother!

I was also blessed to have a wonderful mother-in-law. Jeff's mom, Hazel Sweet, was a little dynamo!  Although not very big in size, "Mom" always had a heart the size of Texas. She could outwork, out-cook, and outwit most of us easily!  As we dealt with her later years and her battle with Alzheimer's, I continually was  thankful that God put her in my life. Her life was not always happy, but she lived it with integrity and a dependence upon the Lord.  Her life was filled with times and events that were very difficult.  Times and events when many would have possibly given up on life and God.  As we watched  "Mom" make that same transition into eternity last year,  I was blessed to see what a gift God gave me in letting me be part of that "Sweet" family in North Carolina.   And I am also blessed to know that she is with my mother, and that heaven is a brighter (and funnier!) place with them there!

Over the past week, I have watched another important woman in my life make that transition.  My sweet Aunt Barbara battled Alzheimer's beginning in her mid-60s.  As my mother's baby sister, Barbara Jean (all good Southern women have double names!) was a huge part of my entire life.  Her love of singing and genuine laughter will always be wonderful memories for me.  During her final days, God gave her a renewed clarity of mind, and we were able to have talks--real talks--like we had not in several years due to her dementia.  I must admit that as I said goodbye to her for the last time in this life the other night, I was hit with a little envy because I knew she would be with my mother, my grandmother, my mother-in-law--soon.  And now she is.  What a blessing!

Music has always been such a special part of my life.  Certain songs "speak" to me, and there is a new country song out that has more liked "screamed" at me recently.  The title of the song is "If Heaven Wasn't So Far Away."  Some of the lyrics are:

If heaven wasn't so far away
I'd pack up the kids and go for the day
Introduce them to their grandpa
Watch 'em laugh at the way he talks
I'd find my long lost cousin John
The one we left back in Vietnam
Show him a picture of his daughter now
She's a doctor and he'd be proud
Then tell him we'd be back in a couple of days
In the rear view mirror we'd all watch 'em wave
Yeah, and losing them wouldn't be so hard to take
If heaven wasn't so far away.

Yes, it would be nice to sit on a cloud and talk for a while, wouldn't it?  If Heaven wasn't so far away--well, someday it won't be.   For those of us who have lost those wonderful women in our lives, that day of reunion is something for which we all aspire--one of these days!

God has blessed my life beyond belief with three absolutely beautiful children. My boys are my rocks--rough and tough! Colton and Conner are the best boys I could ever want. In Katie, God gave me an angel right here on earth. Raising a child with special needs can be challenging, but the rewards of having Katie have far outweighed the problems. Katie has never spoken a word. I've never heard her say, "Mama" or "I love you." But I know those things without words. I see it in her smile. I hear it in her laughter. I feel it (literally) when Katie, now 20, still climbs up on my lap to be rocked. God gave me Katie for a purpose--His purpose. There are days when I'm still not sure what that purpose is, but I know He knows it. That's all that really matters. God made Katie so special, and I have been blessed that He gave her to me!

God also blessed my life with a fourth child.  A child I never held; a child I never got to watch grow up; a child who, for whatever reason,  never lived outside of my body here on earth.  A child who died before I knew him in 2000.  But this is still a child that I love dearly.   My child that is waiting for me in Heaven, and my sweet baby that I will one day meet. 

Through my life, I've had wonderful friends and family who have lost their own children to death--much too early.  Young lives taken away in the prime of youth.  Yet, I've seen in these mothers a remarkable faith--in sometimes just getting up and putting one foot in front of the other to get through another day. I've had precious friends whose hearts have broken as their children have turned their backs on them, or have chosen the wrong paths in life. I've had friends and family who were not blessed with a wonderful mother, but I truly believe God has put others in their lives that have filled that void.  I've known wonderful women who were never blessed with children, but who took an earnest interest in the lives of other young people, and by whom many lives were touched in such powerful ways.

This Mother's Day, thank God for those women He has put in your life--whether it be your mother, mother-in-law, daughter, or friend. If you are still blessed to have your mother here on earth, take an extra moment to smile with her; hold her hand; cherish her. Be proud when someone tells you that your remind them of your mom. I know I surely am! If you have lost your earthly mother, take confidence in knowing that Heaven is all the sweeter with her in it, and one day, Heaven won't be so far way.  You can know with certainty that you will be with her again--this time, for eternity. If you are a mother, cherish those special times with your children. Children are such a blessing--lent to us as parents, for only a short while.

A mother's love indeed may be the closest we can get to God's love in this life. Let's all try to love, not only our children, or our mothers or friends, but everyone in our lives, with that type of love.

I wish for all of you a wonderful Mother's Day 2011!